im back from town. i had expected town to be much more crowded then what it was today. but it wasnt. but, nevermind. anw, i watched 13 going on 30 just now. its a nice and sweet show, i think. and maybe a little sad and touching, since leilani cried. haha.

leilani is so cute. she's so emotional, she starts crying at the slightest sad things. there was once whn i was telling her one of my sad story, and she was so sad for me, she cried. mmm, i didnt even cry, but she cried. tht girl ar.

school was fun. we could wear our own clothings to school. and it was the first time ive seen so many of them in skirt. i mean, i wouldnt have gotten a chance to see veena, hafizah and some of the rest in skirt, if it was not for today, and if i didnt 'force' half the class to wear skirt (:

the teacher's day concert was nice. oh, and im sure the teachers had fun looking at their edited photos. the councillors are just too creative.

anw, i so needed to go for a facial and do a nice padicure! its been a long time since i did padicure. almost did it with leilani just now. mmm, i shall do it these few days. yup (:

`i would do anything to keep your tears from falling, but do you feel my pain.

my whole house smells of cookies now. my sista and i have been baking hundreds of cookies, since seven till now. and im so tired of standing in front of the oven, im at my comp now.

the cookies are so nice! (:

anw, tmr is teachers' day, and be yourself day, and so everyone's suppose to be wearing their own clothings. mmm. this is gonna be so fun. then i can see what everyone is wearing. haha. and it'll be so funny irritating and teasing veena, and the rest. yup.

anw, the cookies are done. i need to wrap them up now. so there. takecare alright. loves! (:

hey. im home frm church! im supposed to be out tracting with my youth group now, but im at home, and happily blogging. i didnt go tracting, because of, eh, i shall not reveal. haha.

anw, im feeling pretty much better now, everyone. so dont worry abt me alright. i'll be able to pull through all these. im strong, remember?

today's sermon was on faith. there's a story tht the pastor shared, abt faith, which inspiried me quite abit.

it goes like this:

there was a man with a dream. he wanted to impress the world, by climbing the world highest mountain. he wanted to show the world how powerful he was, and what he could do. he put himself through two years of training, to prepare himself to climb the moutain. two years of trainings finally passed. it was soon time for him to climb the mountain. he was confident tht he would be able to fulfill his dream, and most importantly, impress the world. so he went to climb the mountain. on his way up, night fell, and the sky started to grow darker and darker. he knew tht it would be so dark, tht he would not be able to see anything anymore. but he continued climbing the mountain anyway. up and up he went. and soon, whn he felt tht he was almost reaching the top of the mountain, and whn his dream seem so close to be fulfilled, the sky was all dark. he couldnt see anything. and suddenly, he slipped and fell. whn he fell, he thought to himself tht why is his life like this. he thought tht he've lost everything. and whn he fell to one point, and he stayed still. he found out tht there was actually a rope tied around his waist, tht held him there, in the mid air. he tired all ways to try and save himself, but was all in vain. in the end, and he shouted for God to save him. after shouting and calling out to God for quite some time, he heard a voice. it says: do you really want me to save you? the man replied: yes, i want you to save me. the voice asked agn: you really believe tht i can save you? the man answered: yes Lord, i believe tht you can save me. and the voice answered: alright. i want you to un-tie the rope tht's attached to your waist. the man replied: what? you want me to un-tie the rope which was the only thing, holding me on falling? and in the end, the man was left there alone, and was freezed to death. a few days later, someone found his body. his body was hung on a rope tht was about 10 feet off ground.

this story tells us tht we have to believe in God and have faith in him. its not only vocal faith, saying tht we believe, we believe. its really believing him in our heart. if the man really believed, tht he would be saved, he would have un-tie the rope. and even if he fell off the rope, the rope was only 10 feet off the ground, and he wouldnt have died.

believe in God's words for his words are eternal.

"The Lord exists forever; your word is firmly fixed in heaven. Your faithfulness endures all generations; you have established the earth, and it stands fast." Pslam 119:89,90

-

i wont put my hands up and surrender ;
there'll be no white flag above my door.

superman ; five for fighting

i can't stand to fly
i'm not that naive
i'm just out to find
the better part of me

i'm more than a bird, i'm more than a plane
more than some pretty face beside a train
and it's not easy to be me

wish that i could cry
fall upon my knees
find a way to lie
about a home i'll never see

it may sound absurd, but don't be naive
even heroes have the right to bleed
i may be disturbed, but won't you conceed
even heroes have the right to dream
and it's not easy to be me

up, up, and away, away from me
it's all right, you can all sleep sound tonight
i'm not crazy or anything

i can't stand to fly
i'm not that naive
men weren't meant to ride
with clouds between their knees

i'm only a man in a silly red sheet
digging for kryptonite on this one way street
only a man in a funny red sheet
looking for special things inside of me

it's not easy to be me

-
ive a sad life, life hates me ; fucking everything.

im home! just took a shower, cos i was just back frm training. training today was at ccab. ive always enjoyed training at ccab, cos i just simply love the pitch there. haha. anw, im dead tired.

ohwell. i dunno why, school have been so tiring. no matter how much i sleep, how much i rest, whatever i do, i'll still be very tired. the worst thing is, there're bad signs, and i think i might get low blood pressure agn.

im going to sleep now. so yeah, thts abt it. laters!

long brown hair \

what goes around, comes back.

i think its so true. everything tht goes arnd, comes back. bad things spreads so quickly, and after awhile, everyone knows it. you dont even realise tht its spreading so fast. sigh. i just dont understand. nvm. i'll get it right someday. just someday :(

im tired. so so tired. i dunno why, but many terrible things have been happening, and they just seem to get worse. nothing's at my side. the world seem to be against me. but i know my conscience is clear. ive got nothing to worry abt. i will make it clear, i just need some time.

anw, nothing seem significant to me anymore. all those things tht i thought was so significant to my life, now seem like nothing. nothing is important to me anymore. practically nothing.

anw, carolyn, if ure reading this, pls give me a call. i need to talk to you terribly. or brenda, if uve reading this, pls get carolyn to call me alright? or anyone la, pls call me. im going to break down soon. this is so terrible. sigh.

alright. this shall all for today. i need to get my work done. rest well alright. loves (:

im home, frm macritchie run! just took my bath, and i feel so clean now. i was sweating like anything and i was so stinky. and the worst thing happened to me whn i reached home. i found out tht, ohwell, you know tht thing? anw, i smell so nice now. and im hungry. but there isnt anything to eat. sigh.

macritchie run was uber tiring la. we ran a total of 6km, and maybe a little more then tht. and my timings were really terrible. i ran my best for the first round, walked half of the second run, and improved on half a minute for the last run. my knee still hurts whn i run.

mr bulb was saying tht we shld be running 40km everyweek. and i think thts totally crazy. how are we suppose to do tht? we're not professional runners, and we're not even running for spore. so why shld we be running so much? anw, i dont think we can do it la. so there.

the path we ran was so rocky and full of monkeys running everywhere. and we were screaming, as we were running along the path with so many monkeys.

and now i found out smth; stc girls are scared of monkeys.

so much for the macritchie run; im so tired now. i need my bed.

anw, the sec2s have to wear yellow for be youself day, which is on teachers' day, next tuesday. it'll be so horrible. imagine the whole sec2 cohort wearing yellow. we'll look like walking bananas. i wonder who was the crazy person who gave the idea of this thing. so annoying.

thts abt all for today. i need to get some work done. the eoys are coming soon, and i need to start my revision, and start mugging now. and i need a rest; im tired. bye.

period; \

im back home frm sch early today. sch havent been really great anw :)

oh, smth interesting tht is, there're eight japanese girls frm the chij convent in japan who're over in sch for an exchange programme. i was really excited whn i saw them okay. there're like so cute. haha. i like the way they speak and their hairstyles. oh, and their convent uniform is unique. its a little different frm ours. they still wear pinafole and blouse, but they wore black shoes, with high white socks. and they look so cute! (:

im really tired of the life im leading, and everything. things havent been going well for me, im having the wrong mindset of many of things, im making many mistakes tht i know i shldnt have been making. life havent been so smooth for me either. there're many things happening, many setbacks, its just tht i didnt tell them to anyone. i feel so small.

anw, to my clique, and classmates, im really sorry if ive been pmsing and showing attitude to you girls these days. i didnt mean to break off frm you girls, going straight home after sch almost everyday, ignoring you sometimes, but im really tired of everything. i need a break frm everything. sometimes i just wished tht i could sleep forever, and never have to wake up anymore.

pls dont hold anything ive done against me alright. pls understand my situation. ive got enough of my own problems to worry abt. im grateful tht all of you are patiently tolerating my nonsense and childplays. im really really sorry for everything.

dont worry too much. im alright. i just need a good break. takecare too alright. loves! (:

` not your perfect girl

hey. this is my new blog, the old one doesnt exist anymore. sp pls relink alright, anw, i didnt find this layout anywhere, neither did i made it myself. jiaen helped my out of this. haha. really got to thank her for this.

anw, im getting really bored. ive been a good girl, staying at home, and watchnig the olympics, and i find it ubercool. anw, aus and usa'd just created a new world swimming records. yay (:

when its about you, its all about you ;